Children, often when we are confronted with difficult situations in life, we do not try to understand their real cause. Until we find a problem’s real cause, we won’t be able to find a permanent solution to it. For example, when a small child cries from hunger, the mother will try to comfort the child by giving it a toy. Upon getting the toy, the child may temporarily stop crying. But soon, as his hunger increases, he resumes crying—even louder. The crying will stop only when his hunger is satisfied.
Some people depend on drugs and alcohol to forget their problems. However, not only does this not solve their problems, it also destroys their health and wealth and shatters their family relationships.
Once, two friends were talking. The first one said, “I heard you started drinking. Why?” The second friend answered, “I’m facing a lot of problems and I’m trying to drown them in liquor.” The first person asked, “Is it working?” The friend answered, “No. They are learning to swim.”
The basic reason for all of our sorrows is the mind’s stubborn attitude that everything has to happen according to our likes and dislikes. This is the root cause of all negative emotions like anger, hatred and jealousy. Our stubborn mind is like the virus that attacks a computer and destroys all its data. It destroys our discrimination and peace of mind; we lose all self-control.
We cannot make this world adhere to our likes and dislikes. We must be able to adjust ourselves according to the circumstances and respond with discernment. We should be able to adapt an attitude of acceptance with regards to the things that are beyond our control. The rosebush has thorns. It is impractical to be stubborn and say, “I just want the flowers, not the thorns.” If there is daylight, there will be night also. If there are joyous times, there will be sad times. We must accept both. A turtle cannot behave like an elephant. Nor can an elephant be like a turtle. Accept the turtle as a turtle and the elephant as an elephant. Learn to stop becoming over-elated, jumping with joy, in success and learn to stop being shattered by hardships. In every situation, guard your contentment—your inner peace and happiness. The ability to have all these qualities is called maturity.
The mind will become mature only when we get rid of our stubborn attitude. A mature mind can face any problem with discernment. This alone is sole solution to all of our problems in life.
Amma, Sri Mata Amritanandamayi Devi